Cubicle dweller: It's better in my head because I'm picturing the elephants.
New Orleans, Louisiana
Overheard by: Jeremy
Cubicle dweller: It's better in my head because I'm picturing the elephants.
New Orleans, Louisiana
Overheard by: Jeremy
Office hoochie on cell: You need to call him and find out who is the source of all the knuckleheadedness.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Police officer, taking initial report on phone: So your stereo was stolen from your vehicle in the hospital parking lot last night? (pause) Okay, sir, I'll get someone out to you to take the report. And sir, I'll be working the security at the hospital tonight and I promise that while I'm on duty no one will steal your stereo out of your car.(laughs) Because it's already been stolen.
Zachary, Louisiana
Boss to underling: It's not that Ender's Game is Sci-Fi, it's just set in the future.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: annoyed office mate
Female coworker: I received your collections file for the $57,700.00 claim. Have you run an asset check on this lady to see if she has anything we can file suit against?
Male coworker: No. When I spoke to her she sounded barefoot, pregnant, and poor. Like she was living with someone else.
Female coworker: I didn't realize you could get all of that from someone's voice.
Male coworker: I'm crunk. I'm good.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: Not Crunk
Oblivious female coworker trying to drink soda through a straw: I think it's broken. I keep sucking and sucking, but nothing comes out.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Chick #1 to IT guy and chick #2: That fat kid on the new Shrek movie sounds weird. (in scratchy deep voice) “Do the roar!”
Chick #2: He sounds like Cartman.
Chick #1: If Cartman and Darth Sidious had a love child, that's what he'd sound like. That fat kid.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Peon to fellow cube-mates: What would happen if no one ever reached their target, but they just kept placing it further and further away for the sake of “striving for excellence”? (pause) Sounds like you're setting up your people for failure. You ever watch Ninja Warrior? That show is the bomb. They have crazy, semi-impossible obstacle courses, and if a contestant passes all four stages, they win. The point is, no one is supposed to win! The obstacles get harder and harder to keep people from succeeding, not to hope and pray that they win… You are all honorary ninja warriors.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: Rio
Cajun: Now I’m thinking about filling the giant jar of babies I have with formaldehyde.
Goodwood Boulevard
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: Booyakish
Supervisor: Was this class as bad I thought?
Female cop, leaving seminar, about instructor: He likes to say 'quick and dirty' way too much and the dude rambles like a drunk riding a bicycle.
Louisiana State Police Head Quarters
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: i snuck out early, too
