Male financial analyst: I’m having trouble counting to eighteen right now.
Wall Street
New York City, New York
Male financial analyst: I’m having trouble counting to eighteen right now.
Wall Street
New York City, New York
Maintenance guy: I’ll tell you. Back when I was in prison, at first, I couldn’t sleep because of all the noise. But I got so used to it that now I can’t sleep when it’s quiet.
Boss: When you were where?
Senlac Drive
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: Need to call the Temp Agency
Sales manager: Do you believe this dude? He just gave me two fake social security numbers for himself like I wouldn't figure it out.
Sales rep: Be careful or he'll steal yours.
Sales manager: Nah, I give the clients a fake name, he won't find me.
Sales rep: Well, he can just use any random eight numbers I guess.
Sales manager: If by eight you mean nine, then yes. You'd be terrible at identity theft.
Sales rep: My stupidity keeps me honest.
Fort Mill, South Carolina
Coworker: And then I told her: “all I want for Christmas is a solid crap.”
Puyallup, Washington
Overheard by: glad I have a strong stomach
Intern, after belching: I’m trying to have style, class, and panache, but it’s just not working.
Broadway
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Sarah
Coworker: Hang on, it's just a hotel in midtown!
Office in Chelsea
Overheard by: Alvaro
vp # 1 to vp #2 "that right there shows you what's wrong with the world. If you can't trust john deere then who the hell can you trust?!"
51st & Harvard, Tulsa OK
Male flight attendant holding garbage bag and walking down aisle: Trash, garbage, jewelery, wallets. Trash, garbage, jewelery, wallets…
Continental Flight from Berlin to Newark, New Jersey
Workbee on cell: Woah, she clogged that toilet? That’s a new toilet! What’d she do, take a gorilla shit or something?!
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Eileen
Female coworker: Babe, I need this one. (hands it to him)
Male coworker: But look, that one is $20 but here's one that's only $8.
Female coworker: But I want this one–it's the one day instead of seven.
Male coworker: Why? Is one day really worth the extra $12?
Female coworker: Well, let's see. If your wang was coated with fire ants, would it be worth the extra $12 to get rid of them in one day instead of seven?
Male coworker: (puts the one-day treatment in the basket)
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Lindsey
