And All Pointing in the Right Direction

Woman on phone: Well, it’ll be nice to have teeth in your mouth again.

10 Exchange Place
Jersey City, New Jersey

Posted on March 8, 2015
Consultants, New Jersey, On the phone

The Only Case in New York

Somber attorney on phone: I’ve got some very bad news… I just got off the phone with the vet, and little Bobo’s sick… He’s got a case of bad attitude. That’s right, a bad attitude.

Empire State Building
New York, New York

Overheard by: Guy Smiley

Posted on February 24, 2015
Consultants, New York, Threats

When English’s Ambiguities Come Home to Roost

Writer handing director a piece of peppermint bark: Be careful. It’s very hard on your teeth.
Designer: It can really do some damage.
Marketing director: You guys are going about it all wrong. You have to learn to eat it like a beaver.

16340 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, Arizona

Posted on February 20, 2015
Advice, Arizona, Consultants

2PM Conference

Presenter: If you knew what I was thinking, what I just said would
make perfect sense.

1 Microsoft Way
Redmond, Washington

Posted on February 4, 2015
Consultants, Philosophy, Washington

3PM Smoke Break

Producer: So you’re from Iowa?
Consultant: No, Ohio.
Producer: Illinois?

333 North Meridian Avenue
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Posted on January 29, 2015
Consultants, Executives, General Idiocy, Geography & History, Oklahoma, Questions

Kind of a Toxic Waste of Everybody’s Time

Reporter: I can’t get away from effin’ Bernie Smith*. Every time the man farts, the attorney general calls me!

Newsroom
Ocean County, New Jersey

Overheard by: inothernews

Posted on January 23, 2015
Consultants, Gripes, New Jersey

Now I Drive the Truck

Ad lady: Yeah, I was always the one who rolled around on the floor and threw myself under a truck, but not anymore.

375 Hudson Street
New York, New York

Overheard by: Harriet Vane

Posted on January 15, 2015
Consultants, Gossip, New York

It’s Just Confusing Me

Media agency lady: Yeah, I met one of your constituents last week.
Sales rep: Well, that would be Ted*, I’m guessing.
Media agency lady: No, it was some sweet young thing.
Sales rep: Oh, well, then that would be Mindy*.
Media agency lady, laughing: Yeah, it was Mindy. Mindy is a piece of work [laughs harder].
Sales rep, chuckling nervously: Wow, that makes me want to ask you so many questions!
Media agency lady, wiping tears from her eyes: Yeah, I bet it does… None of which I would answer, but the fact that you want to ask them should tell you something.

Louisville, Kentucky