Discovered I Need a Bigger Monitor

Guy on cell: So I was online last night looking at dicks…

Newport News, Virginia

Posted on October 12, 2009
Body Parts, Employees, On the phone, Sexuality, Technology, Virginia

D'oh!

Conservative girl: Hey boss, you still got nuts?
Boss: Uh, yeah… Yeah.
Conservative girl: Oh! I mean donuts! (blushes really hard)

Alexandria, Virginia

Posted on October 8, 2009
Body Parts, Bosses and Underlings, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Virginia

That's the Couch, Ma'am.

Intern: Is that you who smells good and smells Italian?

Roanoke, Virginia

Posted on August 25, 2009
Interns & Temps, Questions, Sensory Experiences, Virginia

The Longer Answer Includes “Because You Smell”

Boss in special activities division: The short answer is: it's classified.
Bearded man: What's the long answer?
Boss: The long answer is: it's classified, and I don't like you.

CIA Headquarters
Langley, Virginia

Overheard by: John Alejandro King

Posted on August 14, 2009
Bosses, Employees, Feelings, General Idiocy, Questions, Virginia

The Office Discontinued “Marijuana Mondays” Shortly Thereafter

Coworker sprawled on couch, humming taps: This is for all the brain cells that have been lost today.

Willow Lawn
Richmond, Virginia

Overheard by: Still giggling

Posted on August 10, 2009
Coworkers, Health & Hygiene, Virginia, Weirdness

Sounds Like the Best Diet Ever.

Boss: I'm jealous, I wish I had a colon infection.

Falls Church, Virginia

Posted on July 22, 2009
Body Parts, Bosses, Feelings, Health & Hygiene, Virginia, Weirdness, Wishes

Some Couples Really Shouldn't Write Their Own Vows

Woman to room full of coworkers: I'm not gonna shove a ring up there for a month!

Richmond, Virginia

Posted on July 9, 2009
Body Parts, Coworkers, Sexuality, Virginia, Weirdness

Grey's Anatomy Plotlines Have Gotten Thinner Than Ever This Season

Distraught receptionist on phone: Derek, stealing boots was not our decision, it was your decision.

Reston, Virginia

Overheard by: Receptionist #2

Posted on June 18, 2009
Clothes, Crimes, On the phone, Receptionists, Virginia, Weirdness

Try a Used Dryer Softener Sheet; I'll Look the Other Way

Office cleaning lady: Does anyone know how to clean mice balls?

Arlington, Virginia

Posted on April 24, 2009
Animals, Body Parts, Employees, Health & Hygiene, Questions, Virginia, Weirdness

But, Thanks to Her, We've Got All Our Problems Licked

Manager talking to department: I just really want to thank Katie* for helping out last month. She really jungled a lot of balls…and some of them were pretty hairy.

Richmond, Virginia

Posted on April 21, 2009
Body Parts, Bosses, Employees, Sexuality, Virginia