Office dude to another: Get out of me!
Waco, Texas
Office dude to another: Get out of me!
Waco, Texas
Attorney: It's already been filed with the court! It has a file-mark on it. You can't un-file something!
Austin, Texas
Voice #1 over cubicle wall: It's white, but it turns pink when it's wet.
Voice #2: Yeah, but when you let the sun shine on it, you never know.
Greenville, Texas
Middle-aged salesperson: It's “sal-mon.” It's spelled s-a-l-m-o-n.
Young salesperson: I'm pretty sure the “l” is silent.
Middle-aged salesperson: No, no, no! You need to go back to school like I did to learn how to properly pronunciate things! It's sal-mon. With an “l”!
Haltom City, Texas
Overheard by: Jdub
Doctor: I'm thinking about going up to Austin this weekend.
Nurse #1: What's in Houston?
Doctor: Austin.
Nurse #2: What about Houston?
Doctor: Austin!
Smart-ass tech: Boston?
Lackland Air Force Base, Texas
Overheard by: Geographically Declined
Lady #1: I just had to explain to a 21-year-old what it's like to go to the gyno for the first time. I explained getting pried apart, the ovary exam and the breast exam.
Lady #2: What about the anal exam?
Ladies #1 and #3: (blank stare) What are you talking about?
Lady #2: Don't you get an anal exam at your gyno?
Ladies #1 and #3: No!
Lady #1: You were violated!
Lady #3: This is why I have a female gynecologist.
Lady #2: Well, that would explain why he complimented me on my shave, too.
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Rizzy
Admin #1: You aren't allowed to throw cigarette butts out the window?
Admin #2: You aren't allowed to throw anything out the window.
Admin #1: What about a child?
(pause)
Admin #1: I can't believe I just said that.
Admin #2: It's all good. Maybe cut down on the crack intake.
McKinney, Texas
Coworker to admin: Might sound weird, and I never thought I'd have to say this, but you look pretty good as a zombie.
McKinney, Texas
Boss to beleaguered IT guy: I have no more bandwidth! My hard drive is completely full. I need you to call Steve Jobs and tell him to stop the internet, because this company is getting off right now!
Austin, Texas
Coworker to another: Shut up, at least my husband lies to me!
Waco, Texas
Overheard by: Chris
