Session leader: Now at this point, if you've been convicted guilty of a felony crime, I'll have to ask you to leave.
(one woman starts to walk out of crowded auditorium, abruptly stops halfway)
Woman: Oh, wait! What is counterfeiting?
Session leader: Mam, were you guilty?
Woman: Yes. Oh, wait. No. The trial's still going on.
Mebane, North Carolina
Boss: So what did you think of the meeting?
Underling: It was pretty good -he seemed relatively accommodating and…
Boss: (stares hard at underling)
Underling: Ummmmm?
Boss: Oh yeah, sorry. I farted.
Bay and King
Toronto, Canadia
Overheard by: Wow.
Bank president: Lemme tell you something. There’s five key elements to running a company… now what the hell were they?
Hopkinsville, Kentucky
Overheard by: will1966
Presenter, during company-wide meeting: As this slide demonstrates, the company did it in arrears. [Giggling from the back, and presenter sighs.] Yes, your mom and I did it in arrears. Moving on…
Peachtree Road
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Christin
President, referring to company’s succession plan: I just want to hold out until it gets turned over to you guys. I want to see you guys take it.
Assistant: You see us take it every day.
Rodeo Park Drive
Santa Fe, New Mexico
Chipper corporate trainer: You put an extra ‘-umph’ at the end of ‘tri-‘, and what do you get? Triumph!
4635 East Elwood Street
Phoenix, Arizona
Secretary: Does it involve undergarments? If so, I’m not there.
Norristown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Lan
