Distressed middle-aged man to wife: Well, that’s what happens when you give spiked eggnog to old people!
1250 Broadway
New York, New York
Overheard by: Confused Passerby
Distressed middle-aged man to wife: Well, that’s what happens when you give spiked eggnog to old people!
1250 Broadway
New York, New York
Overheard by: Confused Passerby
Middle-aged secretary #1: Stuart* just farted in my ear. He was standing next to me when I was sitting at my desk, and he fucking farted in my ear!
Middle-aged secretary #2: Ew. I’ve been known to let one slip myself. And the pussy farts are the worst, because you can’t control them.
Middle-aged secretary #1: I see we’re keeping it real.
Law firm
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: ginny
Woman on phone: So, are we talking about the left-hand chicken, or the one o’clock chicken?
Kansas City, Missouri
Coworker: Oh, look! He got you more flowers! Wow, he’s really pursuing you!
Coworker using online dating service: I know! But I told him I wouldn’t go out with him until the divorce is final.
700 East Street
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: Overhearer
Cube worker #1: I think I found the secret project.
Cube worker #2: Mine?
Cube worker #1: You have a secret project?
Cube worker #2: Uh, no.
390 North Robert Street
St. Paul, Minnesota
Golfer to coworker: I’m lucky I’m ambidextrous — great for my game.
Woman: You want to be careful — I know someone who died of that.
Finance Centre
Dublin
Ireland
Coworker #1: The film was so violent… I don’t really like realistic-looking violence.
Coworker #2: Yeah, neither do I. Although, I did get some perverse enjoyment from watching The Passion of the Christ.
Coworker #1: But in this one it’s all the nice people getting hurt.
500 Harris Street
Ultimo, Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Dan
Intercom: Please remember to leave all distinguished butts in the can behind the south building.
14255 49th Street North
Clearwater, Florida
Sales guy #1: If I said it was hot in here, would anyone argue with me?
Sales guy #2: No.
Sales guy #3: It is pretty warm in here.
Sales guy #1: I was gonna say… It feels like an attic in here.
Sales guy #2: I would say it feels like the trunk of my car, but I don’t want to go there.
Assistant: Hmmm… If you said that, we would be obligated to ask how you know what the trunk of your–
Sales guy #2: –Yeah, I don’t want to go there.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Coworker #1: Hey, would anyone like one of my canned Vienna sausages?
Coworker #2: Can you suck the jelly off of it first?
Coast Guard Headquarters
Washington, DC
