VP, introducing new hire at annual opening community meeting: And Tina* here really likes big equipment! (faculty & staff laugh) Well, she used to work for Caterpillar.
President: Sit down, Neal*.
Greensboro, North Carolina
VP, introducing new hire at annual opening community meeting: And Tina* here really likes big equipment! (faculty & staff laugh) Well, she used to work for Caterpillar.
President: Sit down, Neal*.
Greensboro, North Carolina
Communications specialist referring to recent counseling session: Oh! I just did her husband!
Marketing specialist: Well, good for you!
Government building
Raleigh, North Carolina
President: Believe me, porn makes you smart.
Cary, North Carolina
Overheard by: The Body
Coworker #1: Have you seen my pen?
Coworker #2: Nuh-uh.
Coworker #1: Someone has liberated my pen again.
England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Sales guy: I went to a funeral once, and everyone there got a packet of the cremated remains.
Sales girl: That’s a nice parting gift!
Sales guy: Well, we were all supposed to disperse them somewhere. Mine sat on my mantle for about a month. Then I finally threw it away.
Sales girl: You sent the person to the dump?! So wrong! So wrong!
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Salesguy on phone: I got your nuts right here!!
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Employee #1: So basically, I’m going to wear a shirt that says, ‘Ghouls Gone Wild’ on it.
Employee #2: You can’t do that! You have to dress slutty!
Sixforks and Strickland
Raleigh, North Carolina
Overheard by: Heather
Coworker: Well, if she died beforehand, then nobody killed her — they just set the body on fire.
474 Industrial Park Drive
Boone, North Carolina
Technician: Man, I gotta go grab a smoke. I’ve been upstairs mixing chemo for hours!
427 Victor Street
Lincolnton, North Carolina
Overheard by: Suzette Truesdell
Hostess: I once gave everyone in my restaurant an Adderall. We had never been more efficient!
Charlotte, North Carolina
