Neither Did Ronald Reagan.

Coworker: Name three adjectives that you think best describe you.
Intern prospect: Adjectives…is that like “beautiful”?
Coworker: Uh, yeah…
Intern prospect: Okay: I'm patient, organized and I'm a good communicator…but I don't know how to say that.

Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: seriously

Posted on April 24, 2009
Coworkers, Indiana, Interns & Temps, Questions, Words

Have You Tried Looking Behind Your Monitor?

Employee: On this new printer I just installed, we can print double sided.
Crazy-haired boss lady: I don't think I can.
Employee: No, we all can now.
Crazy-haired boss lady: Well, are things double sided on your screen? I don't have anything that is double sided on my screen, so I can't print double sided.

Merrillville, Indiana

Overheard by: CJ

Posted on April 10, 2009
Bosses, Employees, General Idiocy, Indiana, Technology

Not the Most PC Way to Treat Wheelchair-Bound Employees…

Company owner: Everyone who works here, stand up! Who are you kidding, Mary? Sit down.

Indianapolis, Indiana

Posted on March 24, 2009
Bosses and Underlings, Indiana, Questions

And It'll Be Good Practice for Breathing in All the Smoke That's in Hell

Peon #1, seeing ambulance and EMTs in warehouse: What's going on?
Peon #2: Michael's* having a heart attack.
Peon #1: Let's go smoke a cigarette, no one will notice!

Laporte, Indiana

Overheard by: and yes, he lost his job

Posted on March 23, 2009
Coworkers, Health & Hygiene, Indiana, Questions, Smoking

Oh! Well, I'm a Bit Disappointed, I Must Say.

Maintenance guy: Do you have any holes?
Worker: What?
Maintenance guy: Do you have any big holes?
Worker: What?
Maintenance guy: You know, any big holes in the wall that need to be repaired.

Evansville, Indiana

Posted on March 13, 2009
Blue Collar, Body Parts, Employees, Indiana, Questions, Sexuality

Doesn't the Machine Know What I Want?

Coworker #1: Why does the copy machine keep printing out pages with lines on them?
Coworker #2: Because your original is on lined notebook paper.

Bloomington, Indiana

Posted on February 4, 2009
Coworkers, General Idiocy, Indiana, Internet, Questions, Technology

…Until I Can Finally Resolve the Question, “How Many Licks Does It Take?”

Flaming server: Gimme some tape to close this envelope: I don't lick nothin' that doesn't have a sailor attached.

Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indianapolis

Overheard by: Shatmandu

Posted on January 15, 2009
Employees, Indiana, Sexuality, Weirdness

He Also Gets Distracted by Shiny Objects

HR to CEO: No retort needed, Timmy, the proof is in the pudding.
CEO: Mmmmm…pudding!

Lafayette, Indianapolis

Overheard by: Ag dEsigner

Posted on January 9, 2009
Executives, Health & Hygiene, Human Resources, Indiana, Meals and Snacks, Sexuality, Words

Looks Like Al Gore's Lost His Keys Again

Salesman: That guy from the internet is gonna call soon. I think he's in the internet right now or he'd call now.

Indianapolis, Indiana

Posted on January 5, 2009
General Idiocy, Indiana, Internet, On the phone, Sales

That, and All the Erotic Pastry Sex.

Male coworker: What's up with everybody being sick right now?
Female coworker: Seriously! I was sick a few days ago and went to the walk-in clinic. The doctor gave me an antibiotic but I didn't take it. I gave it to my husband because he's sick too.
Male coworker: What do you mean you didn't take it? Why are you being non-compliant with treatment?
Female coworker: Well, this is probably TMI, but I can't take antibiotics. They give me yeast infections.

Columbus, Indiana

Overheard by:

Posted on December 26, 2008
Coworkers, Family, General Idiocy, Health & Hygiene, Indiana, Questions