She Has Trouble Hearing When She’s Going ‘BLURGH!’

Guy #1: I was talking to Megan the other day. She is pretty cool.
Guy #2: Yeah, she is, but man, she is really bulimic.
Guy #3: Bulimic? What does that mean? Does that mean she’s deaf?

YMCA
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Overheard by: T

Posted on May 23, 2015
Dumb Employees, General Idiocy, Gossip, Health & Hygiene, Oklahoma

Helpful Anywhere in the World

Worker bee #1: Five second rule!
Worker bee #2: I’m from India. I can digest toxic waste!

D’Onofrio Drive
Madison, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Minx

Posted on May 20, 2015
Coworkers, Gossip, Wisconsin

Stacey, Did You Just Make a Joke?

Brunette: So, like, she was totally found dead in her office.
Blonde: Omigod! Shut up!
Brunette: Ya. Like, Dr Wong found her dead one morning.
Blonde: Omigod! Shut up!
Brunette: It’s kind of fitting. I mean, she totally lived here at work anyway.
Blonde: Omigod! I would so totally die if someone found me dead in my office!

University of California, Davis

Overheard by: Research Monkey

Posted on May 19, 2015
California, Death, Default, Education, General Idiocy, Gossip, Students

5PM That’s Enough for Today

Suit #1: Oh, fucking great. This is how– [Jon] is getting married. And I have to sign this stupid card along with everyone else like–
Suit #2: Wow, hostile much? We barely know him.
Suit #1: Oh, I know his fiancee quite…ugh, never mind.

71 5th Avenue
New York, NY

Overheard by: Intern hears all

Posted on May 19, 2015
Coworkers, Gossip, Gripes, New York, Relationships, Sexuality, Suits

As Cited in the Madonna Song “You Must Be My Lucky Stall”

Woman on cell passing row of cubes: He has a lucky stall.

White Plains, New York

Posted on May 17, 2015
Compliments, Feelings, Gossip, New York, On the phone

We’re Right on Top of That, Senator

Coworker on cell: So, my friend was like, ‘Dude, they might not let you get on a plane…’ So how do I found out if there’s a warrant out for my arrest?

28 East 28th Street
New York, New York

Posted on May 17, 2015
Coworkers, Gossip, New York, Questions

Only Slightly Worse Than Creamed Chipped Beef

Worker bee #1: My love doesn’t spread well.
Worker bee #2: Really?
Worker bee #1: Yeah, I tried it on toast once.

5100 South Mopac Expressway
Austin, Texas

Posted on May 17, 2015
Coworkers, Gossip, Texas

In This Month’s New England Journal of Medicine: ‘Insurance Forms and the Placebo Effect’

Doctor #1: So I called him when he didn’t show up for his visit and told him I was waiting for him. He told me that he came, signed in, filled out the insurance paperwork, answered some questions, then left and went home.
Doctor #2: What an idiot. Don’t people realize that when you have a doctor’s appointment, you’re actually supposed to go in to see the doctor?

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Moron