Boss #1 to new lab worker: Okay, now we add the virus supernatant.
Boss #2: What are you doing now?
Boss #1: Adding the virus supernatant.
Boss #2: Oh… What is that?
Boss #1: Virus supernatant.
Boss #2: What is that?
Boss #1, irritated: Virus supernatant!
Boss #2: But what is it?
Boss #1: Virus supernatant!
Lab worker #1 to boss #2: Hey, Lou*, what is that? Is it virus supernatant?
Science research building
St. Louis, Missouri
Boss: So, if there is a fire, you go after the hard drives first?
Fireman, dumbfounded: Uhhh… Well… We would go for life preservation first — of whoever’s in the building…
Boss: Oh, and then you go after the computers and stuff?
Fireman: … After that we try to contain the fire…
Graphic design office
Huntington Beach, California
The boss: Some people call it stupidity; I like to call it cleverness.
550 Dulany Street
Alexandria, Virginia
Overheard by: Toni
Boss: What do you think of blood dye?
3120 Lincoln Park Avenue
Los Angeles, California
Boss man: We need a lawyer to handle this. If it were 5 years ago, I’d call my brother. He was the one of the best lawyers in the country, but he can’t help me anymore because he’s been disbarred.
Midtown
New York, New York
Boss: We’ll have to develop this from Ground Zero principles.
5 Thomas Holt Drive
Sydney
Australia
Boss: I really want us to go the whole 11 yards on this.
Employees: [Silence.]Boss: Oh, sorry! Twelve. We need to go the whole 12 yards.
3400 North Charles Street
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Office manager: I mean, when we interview warehouse employees, why are we asking them if they have Excel experience?
Warehouse supervisor: What the hell is ‘Excel’?
England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Marketing manager: Uh-oh. I just totally blogged.
4th Avenue and Clarendon Avenue
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: embarrassed for you
VP: Yeah, and if we go over there, we could get all our stuff back. We have a whole bunch of equipment in China stuck in escargot.
Director: Um…You mean escrow?
VP: What did I say? Escargot? Well that works, too, since it’s so slow in getting back to us.
Director: Sure it does.
45th Street and 9th Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: melissa
