Computer nerd: Last night I had to set my monkey on fire.
California State University
Northridge, California
Overheard by: Scott
Computer nerd: Last night I had to set my monkey on fire.
California State University
Northridge, California
Overheard by: Scott
English professor to secretary: According to my college transcript, I took a course in my freshman year called “introduction to drugs”. I have no recollection of this course, and I wonder why.
Gettysburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: English Major
Very pregnant elementary school teacher: God, I hate screaming kids!
1 Raider Circle
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Fellow Teacher
Secretary #1, talking about the real-life Napa Valley Halloween murder case: The police used his DNA and the kind of cigarettes he smoked to catch the murderer.
Secretary #2: Just like on CSI!
School
Hamilton, Ohio
Overheard by: TV has the best ideas
Professor: … And so, if X equals three, then Y— [loud commotion out in the hall] … I’ve been a little jumpy ever since this one time when I got stabbed in class by a student.
Norfolk, Virginia
Overheard by: thinking about transferring
Reading tutor #1: It’s your turn.
Reading tutor #2: Shut up, I know. I’m thinking. [Places letter on Scrabble board] There.
Reading tutor #3: What’s a gee-ram?
Reading tutor #2: Gram, you idiot.
Lusher Elementary School, Lowerline and Willow
New Orleans, Louisiana
Japanese professor: The peroxides are very volatile. If you drop them, we have to be out of the building before they hit the floor.
Grad student: I won’t drop them.
Japanese professor: And only Japanese ninja can move that fast.
Grad student: OK.
Japanese professor: I am well trained in the art of the ninja.
10900 Euclid Avenue
Cleveland, Ohio
Woman: You know I’m afraid of birds, don’t you? It’s because of that movie and the time my mother burned down a gas station.
Cal State Northridge
Northridge, California
Overheard by: Scott
