Oklahoma

Male employee, leaving bathroom: Be careful in there. I just gave birth to a little brown man!

Tulsa, Oklahoma

Overheard by: Gagging Uncontrollably

Coworker: I love that movie Dazed and Confused! It’s one of those that you don’t have to be smart to enjoy.

1200 Sovereign Row
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Overheard by: Jayce

Co-worker #1: Did you just say you asked the location to give the
customer a little ass?
Co-worker #2: Yeah, ass…ya know, assistance.
Co-worker #1: Um…once again…ass is not the abbreviation for
assistance.
Boss: What’s going on?

5330 E. 31st Street
Tulsa, Oklahoma

Peon #1: Hey, boss, there is a water leak up on the second floor.
Boss: Well, let's get up there and check it out.
Peon #2: So there's a leak in the roof, huh?
Peon #1: Yeah, but the good thing is: it only leaks when it rains!

Elk City, Oklahoma

Office assistant: I can take 'em in my mouth all day long, but not in my body.

Tulsa, Oklahoma

Seven-year-old daughter on speakerphone: I saw a cute mother-daughter necklace at the store. It said “if daughters were flowers I'd still pick you.” See, mom? I'm like a flower! I smell sweet!
Mother: Yeah, and when you die, I'll throw you away.

Pryor, Oklahoma

Overheard by: Danielle

Chelsea's* boss, pointing to a 3-foot tall box: So Chelsea*, want some condoms?
Chelsea*, indignant: I don't need any!
(client laughs)
Boss: Chelsea*! Not you! For the clients!
Chelsea*: Oh sure! For the clients, yeah.

Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Sales assistant on phone: What? I thought you were a boy. Well, as long as they don’t match.

Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Overheard by: what?

Guy #1: I was talking to Megan the other day. She is pretty cool.
Guy #2: Yeah, she is, but man, she is really bulimic.
Guy #3: Bulimic? What does that mean? Does that mean she’s deaf?

YMCA
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Overheard by: T

Worker: I need you to pick up one of my kids, since you're already out there.
Peon: Why? What happened?
Worker: She missed the bus…again. Oh, wait, it gets better. It was the short bus. How do you miss the freaking short bus? It waits for you! The cherry on top of the sundae is that this is the second time it's happened.

Oklahoma City, Oklahoma