Sacrilicious!

Tech, watching movie trailer online: Man, that’s delicious. It’s like drinking Jesus’s sperm.

Hyde Park
Austin, Texas

Posted on December 28, 2007
Gossip, Tech People, Texas

I Had a Very Progressive High School Biology Teacher

Cube monkey #1: It’s not like there are a lot of straight people at this office to sleep with.
Cube monkey #2: You could sleep with the IT guy — Harold*.
Cube monkey #1: Ew, he’s a whore. I don’t want to get crotch rot.
Cube monkey #2: What on earth is crotch rot? I’ve never heard of that.
Cube monkey #3: Not only have I heard of it, I have smelled it!

731 Pilot Road
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Anna

Posted on December 26, 2007
Coworkers, Gossip, Health & Hygiene, Insults, Nevada

I Had to Bite My Tongue Bloody, Though

Coworker #1: She keeps sending me e-mails from home, wanting me to do all this shit that can totally wait until she gets back in the office… She’s supposed to be on vacation, for Christ’s sake!
Coworker #2: So just tell her to back off!
Coworker #1: Nah… I e-mailed her and told her she should be using this time to relax and recharge, and that we would tackle this stuff once she’s back in the office and refreshed from vacation.
Coworker #2: Wow… That’s the most eloquent ‘Fuck you’ I’ve ever heard!

Carruthers Parkway
Franklin, Tennessee

Overheard by: quite impressed

Posted on December 25, 2007
Coworkers, Gossip, Tennessee, Words

Could Be Worse. Could Be Foot Skin.

Male worker #1, pointing at desk: What is that?
Male worker #2: I don’t know.
Male worker #1: It looks like a booger, and it’s not mine!
Male worker #2: How do you know it’s not yours? It’s on your desk!
Male worker #1: Because I eat mine.
Male worker #2: Oh, God…

1574 South West Temple
Salt Lake City, Utah

Overheard by: Shaun

Posted on December 24, 2007
Coworkers, Gossip, Health & Hygiene, Utah

Though Not Quite Up to Golden Girl Standards

Boss: Man, there were some fine cougars in there! I mean, this one woman — she had gray hair, but she was, like, hot! I mean, like Falcon Crest-hot!

Bonner Springs, Kansas

Posted on December 20, 2007
Bosses, Gossip, Kansas

Possibly from Your Verbal Diarrhea

CSR: Do you like my dress? The website called it a muumuu, but I call it a dress. I don’t like dresses, but I wanted to wear one today. Did you know I don’t like silk dresses? They make me feel naked, and I don’t like feeling naked except when I’m naked — like when I’m naked in the shower… I ordered this dress from a website I found at work, and I got it in a box a week later. I don’t think it should have been in a box, because the box could have been damaged and then my dress would have been ruined, because boxes don’t protect anything.
Annoyed coworker: Um, you have a stain on your muumuu.

Coralville, Iowa