Maybe You Should Try Singing with Your Mouth

Employee on phone: Church choir practice kicked my ass last night!

1400 Douglas Street
Omaha, Nebraska

Overheard by: DB

Posted on October 18, 2016
Arts, Employees, Gossip, Gripes, Nebraska, On the phone

We Really Need a Sneeze Guard

Worker bee: Sorry, I got my lesbian juices all over it.

200 West 7th Street
Cincinnati, Ohio

Overheard by: Phone Slave

Posted on September 21, 2016
Coworkers, Gossip, Ohio

But Count Me In!

IT guy #1: It seriously sounded like someone was drowning a midget [makes high-pitched gargling noises].
IT guy #2, just walking in from hall: Whoa, that’s not a conversation I’m normally apart of.

Richmond, Virginia

Posted on August 25, 2016
Gossip, Tech People, Virginia

And the Stamina to Keep It Running?

Old boss: I used to do bad things, you know.
Young employee: Really?! Yeah, right.
Old boss: Yeah, like dealing coke. How do you think we got the money to start this place?

Des Moines, Iowa

Posted on August 15, 2016
Bosses and Underlings, Gossip, Iowa

Neither Improves the Turkey’s Flavor, Though

Lady peon: You can fit a lot tampons in there, but pads are a completely different story.

Fayetteville, Arkansas

Overheard by: So What?

Posted on July 16, 2016
Arkansas, Coworkers, Gossip

Mrs. Fields Has Her Fingers in a Lot of Pies

Sweet-looking old lady on phone: What’s the word on the street? Yeah, that little girl will do just fine… I told her it doesn’t hurt. Well, if you get a good client, it doesn’t hurt… Well, I’ve got twenty… Great, bye!

University
Fort Collins, Colorado

Overheard by: Terrified Co-Worker

Posted on July 12, 2016
Colorado, Creepsters, Gossip, On the phone

They’d Look Like Mating Coral Snakes

Grunt #1: Jack* and Cindy* both wore maroon shirts and pinstripe pants to work today.
Grunt #2: Don’t you wish they’d just make out already?
Grunt #1: Totally.

Wausau, Wisconsin