Lady suit: Did you see that chicken?
Male suit: What?
Lady suit: Yeah, the chicken with the keyboard…
Male suit: Um…
120 Fairview Park
Washington, DC
Lady suit: Did you see that chicken?
Male suit: What?
Lady suit: Yeah, the chicken with the keyboard…
Male suit: Um…
120 Fairview Park
Washington, DC
Lawyer: Have you been involved in any bike accidents?
Potential juror: I was hit by a car while riding my bike in the Hamptons. I was seriously injured, but I didn’t die.
60 Centre Street
New York, NY
Suit dancing with self through cubicles: Hubba, hubba! Ding, ding! I dance like a washing machine!
Cottonwood Lane
Colleyville, Texas
Overheard by: I don’t dance at all…
Suit #1: Hey, I can’t believe you actually remembered to take care of it.
Suit #2: Why? I have a great memory. I can’t remember the last time I forgot something.
3 2nd Street
Jersey City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer
Suit: I don’t like movies with subtitles. You spend all your time reading instead of watching the movie.
Lady suit: Uh-huh.
Suit: Oh, I saw Wild Hogs this weekend. It was a hoot.
7 Hanover Square
New York, New York
Important European suit: It’s like feeding Ethiopians — there’s never going to be enough food.
Midtown
New York, New York
Overheard by: And I Thought I Was Offensive . . .
Suit #1: We’re introducing a great new investment product.
Suit #2: Oh yeah. Features?
Suit #1: Well, if you die before it matures, you get your money back.
Wellington Street
Toronto
Canadia
Suit: It was kind of like Little Red Riding Hood, except with Mexican hookers.
Irving, Texas
Suit #1: So she said the snake got loose in her apartment and they can’t find it.
Suit #2: Well, until they do, she’s gonna have to sleep with her ass up aganst the wall!
32nd Street
Jersey City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer
Female suit on phone in restroom stall: Sorry, I'm in the restroom. So how was the other night? (pause) Oh…I see…what do you mean you didn't do him? (pause) That guy was adorable! There's no excuse for that! (pause, then in a subdued tone) Oh, he likes men…
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Forbes
