CSR #1: She just has a hard time with things, you know? Being deaf and partially blind and all…
CSR #2: Well, that can be hard.
Austin, Texas
CSR #1: She just has a hard time with things, you know? Being deaf and partially blind and all…
CSR #2: Well, that can be hard.
Austin, Texas
Secretary on phone: No, I haven’t been well lately. I’ve had a bout of shingles all summer. From my breast bone to my hip, all down my right side… Shingles! No, shingles! Do you know what that is? It’s herpes! All down my right side!
1 Beacon Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Grunt #1 on phone: They said that I was down there for one of two reasons — to buy drugs or find a prostitute.
Grunt #2, after #1 hangs up: I don’t want to know. As long as it was billable…
Grunt #1: What’s the task code for hiring a prostitute?
180 North Wacker Drive
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: in tears
Female office worker: I think I like this purse more than my Coach purse. It fits more stuff. I could fit a burrito in here! Actually, I do have a burrito in here.
350 Los Ranchitos Road
San Rafael, California
Receptionist: I told him, ‘It doesn’t matter if she’s weird or if she meows like a cat, she’s still your teacher…’
4 Choke Cherry Road
Rockville, Maryland
Overheard by: I never had teachers like that
Cube rat on phone: I saw the puppy on my lunch break… Yeah, now I have to go home and scrub the bathroom floor with my teeth.
Irving, Texas
Female analyst: Actually, my parents are in town this weekend. I think we’re going to go see the Dead Sea Scrolls.
Male analyst: Oh! The Dead Sea Scrolls! You mean… the band?
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Bored Actuarial Intern
Old woman: She’s been doing the moonwalk.
Young woman: That’s great!
Old woman: They’re waiting to find out the results of her biopsy.
Young woman: Yeah…
417 3rd Avenue
Albany, Georgia
Summer associate to managing partner: … And then my mom told my date, ‘The monkey can play in the trees, but not in the bush.’
Century City, California
Cube dweller #1: Hey, today’s your first paycheck, right? What are you gonna do with it?
Cube dweller #2: I gonna buy a new whip.
Englewood, Colorado
