Dean: I don’t think we can be the best in the United States, but I do think we have a shot at being the best in the world.
College Station, Texas
Overheard by: Faith
Dean: I don’t think we can be the best in the United States, but I do think we have a shot at being the best in the world.
College Station, Texas
Overheard by: Faith
Music industry worker: I want to hear that one pretty song about her dad dying.
150 5th Avenue
New York, New York
Medical dispatcher giving CPR instructions: Now straddle his lips with your hips…
San Jose, California
Overheard by: firechick
Office monkey #1: I’m sure it’ll be fine.
Office monkey #2: But what if it isn’t?
Office monkey #3: Then it won’t be.
University of Washington
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Office monkey #4
Peon, reading: ‘The essence of client trust accounting is contained in these three words: Client, trust, accounting.’ Really? I would have thought more like, ‘Thermometer, Frankenstein, candle.’
Hall of Justice
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Jeffner
Chipper corporate trainer: You put an extra ‘-umph’ at the end of ‘tri-‘, and what do you get? Triumph!
4635 East Elwood Street
Phoenix, Arizona
Attorney: Can we file this psychopathically?
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Legal Cube-Dweller
Female worker: Something about his office seemed very home-like. I think he had a couch in it.
Male worker: It was a lamp.
Hillcroft Street
Houston, Texas
Worker bee: Oh my god! I’m so excited, I’m gonna pee on the carpet! I got the e-mail about that 11-thousand-dollar deal! [Stands up up and lifts leg] Psss… Psss… Look at me! I’m the cat! I’m peeing on the carpet!
Nashville, Tennessee
Library supervisor: Can you hand me those staplers? I’ve gotta take them back to those who dwell in the rear.
Library
Columbia, South Carolina
