Boss: Your job isn’t to solve problems; your job is to find solutions.
117 South Street
Hopkinton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Guido Sarducci
Boss: Your job isn’t to solve problems; your job is to find solutions.
117 South Street
Hopkinton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Guido Sarducci
Boss: You know what my problem is? I’m too nice a guy. I fired [Lenore] this morning. I should’ve kept her on till the end of the day, but then I would’ve felt like I was using her. I’m an idiot.
Salesperson: That’s two problems.
40 Shuman Boulevard
Naperville, Illinois
Boss: I don’t need to see everything before it goes out the door. Just send me a final, final, rough draft.
Union Square
New York, New York
Manager: Is Italy a country?
Nashville, Tennessee
Police sergeant: Have you done those sexual child abuse talks at the school yet?
Civilian employee: Yes, and several of the children need to file a report.
Police sergeant: Great! Now we have more work. Whose idea was it to do those talks?
8620 California Avenue
South Gate, California
Boss #1: So this year’s convention will be at the MGM Graham in Las Vegas…What?
Boss #2: Did you say “graham” like graham cracker?
Boss #1: It’s not “graham”?
3411 Pinnacle Gardens Drive
Louisville, Kentucky
Coworker: There is a really neat installation art center in Omaha.
Boss: What city in Omaha?
Coworker: Uh… Omaha.
Boss: Right, but what city?
Coworker: [Long pause] Hard to say.
Woodhaven, New York
Boss: We need to account for shipping to the Stans. You know what the Stans are, right?…You know, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Iranistan, Kakistan, Islamastan…
Employees: …
10418 Donner Pass Road
Truckee, California
Boss to magazine editor on phone: Hello? Sorry, what’s your name? Jeff? Jeff? Really? Sorry, it’s just… you sound like a woman.
UK
Boss: Well, we’ll come to that bridge when we cross it.
Assistant: I would certainly hope so.
Boss: What?
Assistant: Nothing.
Kansas
