Crimes

Worker bee #1: I don’t know how good an idea that is in a canoe.
Worker bee #2: What? At worst, they could get you for public intoxication.
Worker bee #1: I’m not worried about the legal ramifications. I’m worried about the drowning ramifications.

9000 Plymouth Avenue North
Minneapolis, Minnesota

Worker bee #1: I don’t know about dating him. I can’t get over the age difference. It would be–
Worker bee #2: –Like raping a child?
Worker bee #1: Well, no…
Worker bee #2: Not your, like, son…
Worker bee #1: [Silence.]

Dallas, Texas

Overheard by: Cube Eavesdropper

Woman to boss: You should absolutely take your daughter to see To Kill a Mockingbird. Unless, of course, you’re worried about rape.

Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Name-dropper: I know a guy who’s been on Cops twice!

Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: Quizno

Woman on phone: What do you mean, you never thought you would get caught in a stolen car?!

Columbia Business Park
Columbia, South Carolina