Receptionist: … And let me just tell you, those at-home wart freezers do not work on your poonani.
Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Glad I wore my space suit
Receptionist: … And let me just tell you, those at-home wart freezers do not work on your poonani.
Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Glad I wore my space suit
Visiting consultant: I think we saw every public restroom in San Francisco. Just what I wanted — a urine-filled holiday.
5760 Highway 80 East
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
Coworker: I think he’s on crack. I mean, in a good way. I just think he’s on crack.
1901 West University
Tempe, Arizona
Office Worker: He was like, “I spent a long time filling out these forms, so you bastards had better donate to the combined federal campaign.”
2 Massachusetts Avenue NE
Washington, DC
Boss: Where is [Blake] today?
Girl in cube: I don’t know. He didn’t text me. I think he’s too embarrassed.
Boss: Why? Did you guys end up making out in front of everyone again at happy hour?
Girl in cube: No! Give me a little credit.
[Long pause]Girl in cube: It was in a cab.
350 Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Computer technician: I swear to you, they're going to find Bin Laden, and he's going to be working at the Dell call center.
Manhattan, New York
Assistant #1: Did you know that one of the ingredients in gum is coyote urine?
Assistant #2: Did you know that there’s something in cat urine that causes schizophrenia?
Buckhead Loop
Atlanta, Georgia
Black woman: Cecil* has this giant boil on his back and he got this idea about using the vacuum cleaner…
White woman: Stop! I’m eating lunch here. No stories about boils.
Black woman: Would a story about Cecil’s idea about constipation and a vacuum cleaner be alright?
5760 East Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
Dude: The show was great, but the crowd made a noise like 10 thousand rats being run over by a car.
Route 9
Westborough, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Shreklichkeit
Male banker on phone: He cheated on her and she took him back. Now I think she might dump him, which is really funny because, you know, he’s got everything, and she’s just so… average!
54th Street and Park Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: not-nearly -as-shallow female banker
