Manager #1, smugly: It is just community college.
Manager #2: Yeah, no promotions for her here.
Englewood, Colorado
Overheard by: Did he really just say that?
Manager #1, smugly: It is just community college.
Manager #2: Yeah, no promotions for her here.
Englewood, Colorado
Overheard by: Did he really just say that?
Security guard: Brain massage.
Cop: Brain massage? That works?
Security guard: Oh yeah, totally.
Manhattan, New York
Straight girl: My trainer told me that regular massage helps reduce the appearance of cellulite, I just don't know if I can walk in somewhere and be like, “hey, could you just massage my ass and thighs?”
Lesbian: You know I'm a trained massage therapist.
Straight girl: So I could just pay you to massage my ass?
Lesbian: Sure.
Straight girl: Actually, you should pay me to massage my ass.
Fort Mill, South Carolina
Young overly loud female coworker: Lots of women's uteruses fall out. (puts hand on extremely pregnant female coworker) Don't worry, that won't happen to you.
Bee Caves Road
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Just trying to eat my lunch
Guy on cell: So, see, I never said nothin' to Elise*. If I was gonna say somethin' 'bout Elise, I would'a gone through Amber*. I wouldn't never say nuthin' about Elise to Amber, see. It's a respect thing. There's a process you got to go through. If I have something to say about Elise, I gotta go through Marsha*.
Richmond, Virginia
Male pharmacist to female pharmacy assistant: You have to push it in, then push it out.
Perth
Australia
Overheard by: Andrew
Coworker #1: How was The Simpsons Movie?
Coworker #2: Pretty good.
Coworker #1: It’s not the cartoon version, is it?
Coworker #2: Uhh… Yeah.
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
<b>vp:</b> you're brave for bringing a chick-fil-a bag into the office.
<b>president:</b> what? Why?
<b>vp:</b> apparently the founder is openly anti gay marriage and donates to anti-gay causes.
<b>president:</b> of for fuck's sake… (yells to the rest of the office) I'm not against gay marriage, I just wanted a fucking chicken sandwich, okay?
Fort Mill, SC
It manager walking by an unusually quiet conference room: Is anyone in there? Or did it end in murder-suicide?
Main Street, Kansas City, MO
Overheard by: It would be better than what I'm doing right now
Lead animator: Quit goofing off!
Animator: I’m not.
Lead animator: I said no goofing off! Get to work!
Animator: I am working.
Lead animator, hitting animator with poster: No talking! Get to work!
Animator: I am working!
Lead animator: [Picks up computer mouse, and throws it across the desk.] Get to work! No talking!
Las Cruces, New Mexico
Overheard by: pretty picture guy
