Woman exiting elevator at lunchtime: And if I get bored, I can just hook up to that Dilaudid in my car!

Renton, Washington

Overheard by: Editoreador

IT guy to another: There's no transitive properties of rock 'n' roll.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Co-worker on the phone to wife, in the middle of a #30-person cubicle area, after returning to the office from a doctors appointmnet. Keep in mind he is famous here for his loud booming voice and frequent conference calls:
"he said my blood sugar was too high so I've got to watch what I eat… My prostrate is okay, so that's good… There's a pleasant exam."
and there's an image that will take many drinks to get out of my head.

Blue Ash, OH (Cincinnati, OH area)

Overheard by: TMI

<b>sales manager:</b> it won't get big for me!

Fort Mill, SC

Creepy, geriatric coworker who “flirts” by constantly visiting “his girls” and starting pointless conversations: You know, you're annoying.
Fed up, younger woman: What the hell do you think you are?!

Melville, New York

Assistant manager (speaking to an employee who has a large cut on his forhead): Are you going to wear your glasses tomorrow?
Employee: No.
Assistant manager: But you'll look like harry potter!

274 Hartford Aveenue, Bellingham

<b>black customer service rep:</b> hey, is shaquann* from abc co. A man or a woman?
<b>white sales manager:</b> she's a woman.
<b>cs rep:</b> what is she?
<b>manager:</b> black.
<b>cs rep:</b> I mean is she an owner, a manager, what does she do?
<b>manager:</b> oh wow… Holy shit, I'm such a dumbass… Just… I'm so sorry.

Fort Mill, SC