He Sent Pictures, See?

Assistant checking weather online: Ohhh! Derek* got 12 inches yesterday!
Cube rat: I’m sorry, what did you say?
Assistant: He got 12 inches!

8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina

Posted on July 31, 2007
Dumb Employees, Gossip, North Carolina

When Good Deeds Become Career-Limiting

HR clerk: Excuse me, ma’am, but it appears that you have something stuck in your pantyhose on your left leg.
Visiting manager’s wife: I’m not wearing pantyhose!

5760 East Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi

Overheard by: Brain Dancing

Posted on July 30, 2007
Dumb Employees, Insults, Mississippi

The Weighing of the Liver Was My Favorite Part!

Coworker to intern: So, how was the autopsy? Did you have a good time?

Norristown, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Lan

Posted on July 27, 2007
Dumb Employees, Pennsylvania, Questions

The Less I Know about Christmas, the Better

Blonde desk assistant: When is Christmas this year?
Editor: Tuesday, I think.
Blonde desk assistant: No, I mean what day? Like, the 25th?
Editor: Um… Yeah. The 25th.
Blonde desk assistant: But I thought that was Christmas Eve! When is Christmas Eve, then? [Editor stares.] Give me a break — I’m a Jew.

TV station broadcast center
New York, New York

Overheard by: News Bunny

Posted on July 19, 2007
Dumb Employees, New York, Questions, Religion

I Bet I Can Locate the Dimmest One in the Store

Customer: Could you tell me where the Amaryllis bulbs are?
Clerk #1: Hey, do you know where we keep the bulbs?
Clerk #2: I think they’re on Aisle Four — y’know, with the other electrical stuff.
Clerk #1, to customer: Did you check there? That’s where we keep the bulbs.
Customer: No, no, no — they’re flowers! Do you have any?
Clerk #1: Well, I’m pretty sure we’ve got bulbs. Did you need a three-way one, or a regular one? You should check on Aisle Four, then.

1690 Grande Avenue
Arroyo Grande, California

Overheard by: Blue

Posted on July 18, 2007
California, Dumb Employees, General Idiocy

I Don’t Have a Copy of His Résumé, Either

Applicant: I don’t have a copy of my résumé. A dog threw up on my laptop.

Horsham, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: alxie

Posted on July 17, 2007
Dumb Employees, Gossip, Pennsylvania

Why Marijuana Home-Delivery Services So Often Fail

CSR: So, what city in Philadelphia are we doing the pickup?

Everett, Massachusetts

Overheard by: OK, I feel smarter now.

Posted on July 16, 2007
Dumb Employees, Massachusetts, Questions

Or Until the Ninth Month, in My Case

Preggers peon: You know, people only think you’re pregnant for nine months, but it’s really ten because you don’t know you’re pregnant for the first month.

Nashville, Tennessee

Overheard by: Mic all