Communications manager to public relations specialist about sex toy ban in Alabama: Well, we really can’t control the situation if someone chooses to take one of our novelty items and stimulate their genitals with it.
Sex toy company
Virginia
Overheard by: Sex Writer Goddess
Lawyer: No, no, men can’t touch women, but women can touch men.
Paralegal: Oh, okay. Didn’t know.
Lawyer: Yeah, but whatever.
Law office
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: Pointless Temp
Cube rat: Dude, I got so drunk last night! I ran into this guy I haven’t seen in 20 years — he owns a tow truck. I got so drunk that he put my car on the truck and drove me home!
2300 Crystal Drive
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: Sober but Empathetic
Female coworker to male coworker: You need to squeeze as you smell the hole to make air come out.
Richmond, Virginia
Visitor making fresh coffee in break room: Does this office make coffee with one packet or two?
Employee: Usually one… But there are factions…
1920 East Parham Road
Richmond, Virginia
Male to female coworkers: Do you want to have an insertion party? I mean, do you need some help?
1000 West Broad Street
Richmond, Virginia
Boss: There’s nothing like walking to put the newspapers behind the circulation desk and looking out towards the front and having the first thing you see be the word ‘penis.’
Library
Richmond, Virginia
Office girl: This magazine says that men, on average, have sex 84 times a year.
Older math geek: Hmmm. That’s like one and a half times a week.
Office girl: What do you mean, ‘half’? There are no half-times when it comes to sex.
Older math geek: Trust me, there are.
Chantilly, Virginia
