Boss, during staff meeting: Does anyone have anything to add?
Coworker: Yeah, I just wanted to say that–
Boss: –Man, this coffee tastes weird! [Shrugs and continues drinking.]
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Boss, during staff meeting: Does anyone have anything to add?
Coworker: Yeah, I just wanted to say that–
Boss: –Man, this coffee tastes weird! [Shrugs and continues drinking.]
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Lady employee to friend: Looks like we’re both going solo together tonight.
Club, 815 V Street NW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Matt
Vet examining dog with anal abscess: All this dog needs is an hour alone with its butt and its tongue.
Washington, DC
Office weirdo: Most people don’t realize that mermaids actually have sharp teeth — similar to a shark. They also eat fish… So they have really bad breath.
Washington, DC
Account manager: Um, it’s called the UK. Sometimes it’s a country, and sometimes it’s not.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: When is it not?
Maintenance man #1: Oooh, my date last night had some fine titties.
Maintenance man #2: Yes siree, when we hooked up I loved me some of them.
Maintenance man #3: I’ve seen better than hers. [Gesturing to passerby] Look at those. But I guess I’d have to see them naked to really compare.
Office building, House of Representatives
Washington, DC
