The Classroom

Teacher: Scott*, can you give the next answer?
Student: Religion is the belief in a supernatural and the relationship with this being.
Teacher: Could you please speak normally next time?
Student: I am.

All Saints High School
Whitby, Ontario

Mother: They’re trying to hold him back again. He’s been in preschool twice already. Preschoolers are dull and boring!

The Loop
Chicago, Illinois

Teacher: Are you sure that this is a note from your mother?
Kid: Yeah, she wrote it with her own hand.
Teacher: Okay, so you are going to tell me that you were out for two weeks because your mom had to go to Chicago to buy a bed?
Kid: That’s right. We only buy our furniture in Chicago.
Teacher: Okay, but I don’t believe it. That’s like the note you sent me saying you would be attending a funeral in two weeks. That your grandma was going to be dead in two weeks.
Kid: Yeah, so what.
Teacher: Well, you tell me, was that planned or did she come about with some unfortunate accident?
Kid: They can never pin it on me.

Desert Marigold Lane
Las Vegas, Nevada