Woman, about her boyfriend: He doesn’t just shit on the bathroom floor of any restaurant. He only does it when he’s upset about the food or service. And he wouldn’t do it anywhere really nice — just at places like Arby’s or whatever.
Highway 55
Minneapolis, Minnesota
60-year-old coworker: I wanna go in the back door.
Supervisor: Okay…
60-year-old coworker: I really like going in back doors.
801 Marquette Avenue
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Porter
Large male peon: Oh, I usually take the stairs. Do you mind if we take the stairs?
Large lady peon: Yeah, no-no-no. That’s absolutely fine. I take the stairs all the time. Absolutely. So long as it isn’t up.
Opperman Drive
Eagan, Minnesota
Overheard by: I’m taking the elevator
Trendy vegan worker: What’s that smell? Is someone cooking bacon?
Coworker: There’s some in my salad.
Trendy vegan worker: That’s so odd. I never even liked bacon, but it smells so good! It’s making me horny!
Minneapolis, Minnesota
