If I'm Off by Even One Millimeter, We Might Experience Complete Proton Reversal

Boss: Tara, there is a big stack of Christmas cards on your chair. Please put stamps on each one and make sure they are exactly a quarter inch from both the side and the top of the envelope.
Tara, to coworker: Can you bring a ruler over here? I need to put stamps on the Christmas cards.

Old Town
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Glad I'm not the new girl