Archive for the ‘Lawyers’ Category

5PM That’s a Wrap

Secretary: I’ve been meaning to ask you a question.
Lawyer: Sure, what’s up?
Secretary: So you’re Indian, right? I’m going to an Indian funeral today. And I’m not sure how to act.
Lawyer: Well…you’re not supposed to laugh.
Secretary: But they’re so Indian that they’re going to have her cremated.
Lawyer: That doesn’t mean you can laugh. Also wear all white.

1425 K Street NW
Washington, DC

Overheard by: callmeahab

It Was Butt Cleavage, Too

Attorney to older male clerk: Remember, they have to be issued before April!
Female paralegal to older male clerk: You're gonna have to show cleavage at the court!
Older male clerk: I tried that once; they took eight weeks!
Female legal assistant, muttering: There's your mental image for the rest of the day!

Law Offices
Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: Cubed Up Nearby

The Day the Men in Biohazard Suits Visited Our Office

Paralegal: What color is mozzarella?
Office manager: White, why?
Paralegal: Ummm…I'm going to need an extra bag, I am cleaning the fridge and that bag of mozzarella is like dark brown and green, and I don't mean spots…
Office manager: Uh-uh, here. (hands over bag) I hope it doesn't start moving.
(paralegal laughs and heads toward kitchen)
Paralegal (one minute later): Hey, what color is kiwi suppose to be?

Miami, Florida

Overheard by: joey