10AM Update Report

Assistant: How about an update on the report for the database we talked about last week? Have you gotten to that yet?
IT: I’m not sure which one you’re talking about.
Assistant: Well, currently there is a cross-tab that displays home addresses and a cross-tab that displays financial aid, but we need a report to show us the student records by state with home address, and we need a find-sort for all students with financial aid and a hold on their account.
IT guy: …Um, I couldn’t tell where that sentence began and where it ended.
Dean’s assistant: Neither could I.

633 Main Street
Burlington, Vermont

Posted on November 26, 2023
Coworkers, General Idiocy, Tech People, Technology, Vermont

11AM Conference

Help Desk #1: Who should we send?
Help Desk #2: Let’s send [Jessica].
Help Desk #3: She’s perfect.
Help Desk #2: Of course, she’s female.
Help Desk #1: Yeah, she’s very female!

123 Pitkin Road
Plainfield, Vermont

Posted on April 20, 2023
Advice, Customer Service, Questions, Vermont

…With My Head Up My Butt and All.

Sous chef, passing behind inept intern: Behind you.
(intern backs into him)
Sous chef: Uh, hey…
Intern: I didn't know which direction you were coming from!

Vermont

Overheard by: I know front from back

Posted on December 25, 2022
Bosses, General Idiocy, Interns & Temps, Vermont, Weirdness

3PM Coffee Break

EA: …she’s still learning to change a diaper and all that.
Suit: Really?
EA: Yeah, but it’s been extra hard emotionally because our family is really strict and my dad still can’t admit to himself that this happened. All he’s said is, “I sent you to private school! Don’t they have sex ed there?” and “How could this happen?” Which doesn’t help her at all.
Suit: No, probably not.
EA: It’s like, “Dad, the baby is already here, get a grip.” But, well, she’s the baby of the family and I guess we all know how fathers are.
Suit: No, actually, I don’t. I never met mine.

40 IDX Drive
South Burlington, Vermont

Overheard by: Bubble Wrap THIS

Posted on October 5, 2020
Comebacks, Death, Family, Feelings, Health & Hygiene, Receptionists, Suits, Vermont

10AM Review

Worker: Can you review this for me?
Manager: Why are you asking me all the time?
Worker: Because you’re my team leader.
Manager: There are no team leaders anymore.
Worker: What? Yes, there are.
Manager: No, there aren’t.
Worker: Well, I asked [Jesse] yesterday, and he said he couldn’t do it because he wasn’t my team leader. Why would he say that if there aren’t team leaders anymore?
Manager: Because he didn’t want to do your review.

137 Iroquois Avenue
Essex Junction, Vermont

Posted on January 7, 2019
Bosses and Underlings, Comebacks, General Idiocy, Questions, Vermont

…And We Know Times Are Tight…

Coworker on phone: Well, we do have backdoor service, but it's more expensive than our other services.

West Rutland, Vermont

Posted on October 31, 2018
Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Money, On the phone, Sexuality, Vermont

How Do You Think I Got This Job?

Cigarette-smoking chick #1: Wow, you sucked that down fast!
Cigarette-smoking chick #2: Yeah, I wanted it real bad!

Montpelier, Vermont

Overheard by: I know the feeling..

Posted on June 4, 2018
Friends, Sexuality, Smoking, Vermont, Wishes

I'm More Familiar With Unix

Computer tech, trying to remove picture of very well endowed naked man off computer: Well, I don't know how to get him off.

Vermont

Posted on November 27, 2015
Sexuality, Tech People, Technology, Vermont

…In a Completely Different Context Than Usual.

Coworker #1: With all the rain we've been getting, I bet the streams are running full.
Coworker #2: That depends on how much beaver action there's been. (pause) Did I seriously just say that?

Colchester, Vermont

Overheard by: hddesc

Posted on August 11, 2015
Body Parts, Coworkers, Sexuality, Vermont, Weather, Weirdness

Are My Eyes Open Yet?

Coworker to another, looking at tea in her cup: I think this has caffeine in it, it's called “Wake Up.”

Montpelier, Vermont

Overheard by: tam

Posted on July 2, 2015
Coworkers, Meals and Snacks, Names, Vermont