Make Sure They Put It in a Box

Pizza worker: Hello, XYZ Pizza* — will this be for pick up or delivery?
Customer: Delivery, but we will come in to pay for it.
Pizza worker: Pardon me? Do you want your order delivered or will you pick it up?
Customer, to someone in background: Do you want to just pick the food up if we are going in there anyways? [Into phone] I guess we will pick the food up.

Lackawanna, New York

Everyone Knows Encyclopedias Are Just Speculation!

Coworker #1, reading article: ‘Morphine is highly addictive…‘
Coworker #2: Morphine is not addictive.
Coworker #1: But it says right here in this encyclopedia article–
Coworker #2: –Morphine is not addictive.
All other coworkers: It says right here!
Coworker #2: Morphine is not addictive! I know this for a fact!

Lunch break
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia

The English Don’t Think So

Suit #1: He’s from England, from some place called Portsmouth. I think it’s spelled P‑O-R-T-S-M-I-T‑H, but it’s pronounced like Ports Mouth.
Suit #2: Wait. Is it Ports Mouth, or Ports Smith?
Suit #1: I don’t know. It’s some place in Europe, I think.

Hotel
Kowloon, Hong Kong
China

Overheard by: Embarrassed American

I Thought Buddy Holly Was Weezer?

Coworker #1: You don’t know who Buddy Holly is?
Coworker #2: No.
Coworker #1: “Pretty Woman”?
Coworker #2: I thought that was Richard Gere.

Seattle, Washington


3PM Coffee Break

Copywriter: Were you looking for me?
Designer: Sorry?
Copywriter: Before, when I was in that meeting…it looked like you were looking for me.
Designer: Ah…Where I walked over, sighed, and declared “Tragedy”; I was actually looking for the coffee. The window to your meeting room just happened to be behind the machine. You guys have better coffee than our side.

12655 Beatrice Street
Los Angeles, California