Employee #1: Is George Harrison the guy that directed Star Wars?
Employee #2: No that's George Lucas.
Employee #1: Oh, but he was in Star Wars then.
Employee #2: No, that's Harrison Ford.
Employee #1: Oh. Wasn't Frank Sinatra in The Beatles?
Addison, Texas
Female coworker #1: You smell like a perfume I used to wear.
Female coworker #2: Did you just say I smell like a turkey baster?
Seattle, Washington
Person #1: My vagina is as fucked as the Gaza strip.
Person #2: Can I suggest a nice Jewish gyno?
Person #1: I don't want her to colonize my vag. Monistat will work just fine.
Person #2: You could just shove some Challah bread up there and have the yeast go to town on your sorry ghettoized crotch.
Boston, Massachusetts
Colleague, chatting up receptionist on Monday morning: Me and the water polo boys can be a pretty rough crowd when we want to be.
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Nathan
Cubicle rat on phone: I expect a white man to lie to me, not a black guy.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Greg
Woman on the phone (groaning): What are they protesting this time? (pause) Are they protesting polar bears again?
Rockville, Maryland
Overheard by: who wouldn't protest?
Woman carrying heavy files: I need to go down to the branch and drop this off.
Man: Hello–I can help you carry that.
Woman: Aww! You had me at “hello”!
Man: You had me at “go down”!
Melville, New York
Boss: Yes, and the other lady's name is “Glenola,” like a Granola bar.
Caller: “Glenola”?
Boss: Yeah, she's the black one.
Sun City, Arizona
Overheard by: Mama en Fuego
Employee: Fuck you very much for calling Blockbuster; how may I abuse you?…Oh, hi, Bill* [regional manager]…Yeah, today’s my last day.
Blockbuster
Del Mar, California
Overheard by: Petyr
Co-worker #1: Hey, are your balls getting hot?
Co-worker #2: Quite.
Co-worker #1: I hear a hot laptop kills your sperm.
Co-worker #2: I’m all for it. I smoke the seeds, too.
1759 T Street NW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Brendan B