CSR: I'm taking a transvestite hooker over a straight hooker any time.
Scarborough
Ontario
Canadia
I'm For Same-Sex Sandwiches!
<b>vp:</b> you're brave for bringing a chick-fil-a bag into the office.
<b>president:</b> what? Why?
<b>vp:</b> apparently the founder is openly anti gay marriage and donates to anti-gay causes.
<b>president:</b> of for fuck's sake… (yells to the rest of the office) I'm not against gay marriage, I just wanted a fucking chicken sandwich, okay?
Fort Mill, SC
Firing People's Just the Icing on the Cake
IT manager: I wish I worked in HR, they're always either eating cake or firing people.
New York City, New York
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Boss: Is that Amazon?
Office manager, answering phone: No, it was recording.
Boss, interrupting again: Was it Amazon?
Office manger: No, it was a recording.
Boss: You sure?
Office manger: Yes. It was silent and beeped and started the recording.
Boss: I thought it was Amazon. [Phone rings again] Is that Amazon?
Office manger: Yes, I’m on hold.
Boss: Maybe you should talk to them.
Center City
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
We've All Been to Those Staff Meetings
It manager walking by an unusually quiet conference room: Is anyone in there? Or did it end in murder-suicide?
Main Street, Kansas City, MO
Overheard by: It would be better than what I'm doing right now
That's When You Get a Job and Send the Kid to Public School
Coworker #1: I got so mad at my daughter that I threw a spoon through my refrigerator.
Coworker #2: Through it?
Coworker #1: Well, I dented it.
Coworker #2: Oh, that's no big deal. Everyone I know has done that.
Center City
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Sorry, the Clown Suit Keeps Throwing Me Off
Lead animator: Quit goofing off!
Animator: I’m not.
Lead animator: I said no goofing off! Get to work!
Animator: I am working.
Lead animator, hitting animator with poster: No talking! Get to work!
Animator: I am working!
Lead animator: [Picks up computer mouse, and throws it across the desk.] Get to work! No talking!
Las Cruces, New Mexico
Overheard by: pretty picture guy
If I Didn't Have a Window, We'd Probably All Need Gas Masks
Legal counsel: I normally just crack it when I'm expecting someone.
Madison, Wisconsin
Everyone Else Was Afraid of Heights
Proud boss, hands on hips: I got a call from my wife today. I’m going to be Jesus Christ tomorrow in my church play!
Nashua, New Hampshire
Overheard by: freakazoid
We'll Need a Detailed Written Account Of Those Things, Sir
Boss on phone: Hey, uh, I booked a vacation with you guys and pre-paid and everything, and uh, well, (pause) I don't really know how to say this, but uh, I did some things… You know, uh-uh-uh, things you do when you are on vacation, uh-uh-uh-uh-uh… and… uh, well I overslept and missed my flight back home, so I had to buy another airline ticket and want to know if I can get some of my money back.
Richmond, Virginia