Co-worker #1: Hey, did you all bring in cookies?
Co-worker #2: God, you’re like a shark when there’s blood in the water.
3701 Wayzata Boulevard
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Archive for the ‘Meals and Snacks’ Category
1PM Lunch
Co-worker #1: How was your lunch?
Co-worker #2: It was okay. We had an old Greek waitress. I didn’t care for her too much.
Co-worker #1: Was it the fact that she was old or Greek?
Co-worker #2: It was a combination. Greeks are a weird people.
444 Park Avenue South
New York, NY
One of the Olsen Twins, Perhaps
Lady suit, at lunch: How is it?
Male suit: It needs something.
Lady suit: Perhaps you should have asked for a more aggressive vegetable.
9th Street and Main Avenue
Durango, Colorado
You Did Say She Was Finger-Sniffin’ Good
Employee to boss returning from lunch with wife: Excuse me, can I smell your fingers?
Frisco, Texas
No One Has Ever Done That
Crazy coworker, on saving money: You can live without toilet paper, because you could just use Kleenex instead, but you can’t live without steak!
Collegeville, Pennsylvania
Open Marriage Is Free, but Not Easy
Office lady on cell: Yeah, I was supposed to have lunch with my husband, but he was busy with his girlfriends. (pause) Yeah, at least he tells me when he dates. (pause) Me? No, I just fuck whoever I want, and he can kiss my ass. (pause) Yeah, I am free Thursday.
Chicago, Illinois
Why Do We All Act Like Cartoon Characters at Work? Discuss.
Program manager #1, in midst of cubical maze: Hey, where did all that bacon go?
Program manager #2, chanting happily: Bacon bacon bacon!
Utah
Overheard by: Snickering Intern
1PM Lunch
Broker: I’m going to grab some lunch; if my wife calls, tell her I’m not going down tonight. She’ll just have to wait until tomorrow.
250 West Pratt Street
Baltimore, Maryland
The Code Remains Unbroken
Dumb girl: Why do they call it ‘Chicken Cordon Bleu’?
Dumb guy: Uh, duh! Cor-don-bleu… It means ‘ham-and-cheese’!
Rockford, Illinois
They’re Made with Those Broccoli Pigs
Self-important guy: Most hot dogs in the US are pretty much vegetarian anyway.
Lexington, Massachusetts
Overheard by: amused and disgusted
