Co-worker #1: Hey, did you all bring in cookies?
Co-worker #2: God, you’re like a shark when there’s blood in the water.
3701 Wayzata Boulevard
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Co-worker #1: Hey, did you all bring in cookies?
Co-worker #2: God, you’re like a shark when there’s blood in the water.
3701 Wayzata Boulevard
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Co-worker #1: How was your lunch?
Co-worker #2: It was okay. We had an old Greek waitress. I didn’t care for her too much.
Co-worker #1: Was it the fact that she was old or Greek?
Co-worker #2: It was a combination. Greeks are a weird people.
444 Park Avenue South
New York, NY
Lady suit, at lunch: How is it?
Male suit: It needs something.
Lady suit: Perhaps you should have asked for a more aggressive vegetable.
9th Street and Main Avenue
Durango, Colorado
Employee to boss returning from lunch with wife: Excuse me, can I smell your fingers?
Frisco, Texas
Crazy coworker, on saving money: You can live without toilet paper, because you could just use Kleenex instead, but you can’t live without steak!
Collegeville, Pennsylvania
Office lady on cell: Yeah, I was supposed to have lunch with my husband, but he was busy with his girlfriends. (pause) Yeah, at least he tells me when he dates. (pause) Me? No, I just fuck whoever I want, and he can kiss my ass. (pause) Yeah, I am free Thursday.
Chicago, Illinois
Program manager #1, in midst of cubical maze: Hey, where did all that bacon go?
Program manager #2, chanting happily: Bacon bacon bacon!
Utah
Overheard by: Snickering Intern
Broker: I’m going to grab some lunch; if my wife calls, tell her I’m not going down tonight. She’ll just have to wait until tomorrow.
250 West Pratt Street
Baltimore, Maryland
Dumb girl: Why do they call it ‘Chicken Cordon Bleu’?
Dumb guy: Uh, duh! Cor-don-bleu… It means ‘ham-and-cheese’!
Rockford, Illinois
Self-important guy: Most hot dogs in the US are pretty much vegetarian anyway.
Lexington, Massachusetts
Overheard by: amused and disgusted
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist