Office drone to coworker: She had a very busy weekend, but what she was most excited about was the sausage party!
Chicago, Illinois
Office drone to coworker: She had a very busy weekend, but what she was most excited about was the sausage party!
Chicago, Illinois
Coworker to assistant: Do Christians celebrate Christmas?
Phoenix, Arizona
Secretary, getting off business phone call: I don't have time to work with all of this… I need to be planning my Easter dinner.
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: work always gets in the way
Employee at microwave: You know those meatballs have meat in them?
Microwaving employee: Right? Hence, meatballs.
Employee at microwave: Don’t you know the day?
Microwaving employee: Sure, it is Friday all day.
Employee at microwave: Well, it’s Lent, too.
Microwaving employee: You don’t say… Seeing as how I am a big Jew we don’t celebrate that.
Tinley Park, Illinois
Boss on phone: Hey, uh, I booked a vacation with you guys and pre-paid and everything, and uh, well, (pause) I don't really know how to say this, but uh, I did some things… You know, uh-uh-uh, things you do when you are on vacation, uh-uh-uh-uh-uh… and… uh, well I overslept and missed my flight back home, so I had to buy another airline ticket and want to know if I can get some of my money back.
Richmond, Virginia
Receptionist: I’m sorry sir, no one at the tower can answer your call right now, there is a quartet singing a valentine on the floor. [pause] No sir, I wouldn’t lie about such a thing.
N. Frontage Road
Jackson, Mississippi
Serious boss: Tom*, we need to discuss the appropriate use of inflatable novelties at the beach.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Last day at work
Professor: So we'll have lab meeting on Monday, then.
Grad student: Um, that's Labor Day, so people will probably be away.
Professor: Away? Why?
Grad student: Because it's a federal holiday?
Professor: Well, we're not federal, so we don't take federal holidays.
Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
(scientist gets in a packed elevator)
Scientist: I can’t believe it’s this busy the day before Thanksgiving.
Secretary: Surprisingly.
Scientist: I said: “I can’t believe it’s this busy!” It’s the day before Thanksgiving!
Tech: It’s actually two days from Thanksgiving.
Scientist: I’m going to go home and make my turkey tonight. Have it ready for the family!
Suit: What a good idea. You should make the stuffing with it, save time.
(scientist smiles, gets off)
Tech: That wasn’t nice.
Suit: He farted while in an elevator, I don’t care.
Extremely Small Elevator
Research Triangle Park, North Carolina