Producer: My friend went to the Galapagos Islands and was astounded. They have birds called blue boobies. Google “blue boobies”. You’ll see pictures of them.
Suit: I’m not searching for blue boobies on my computer. I’ll get called into the office for a talk.
Producer: Oh, I’ll do it…see?
Suit: Wow, who would have thought that would’t have brought up a porn site?
1910 South Highland Avenue
Lombard, Illinois
Sales: You quoted 3 different prices to this customer.
CEO: You’re not calling me an idiot, are you?
Sales: I’m saying that having been given all the facts you made 3 incompatable decisions.
CEO: That’s sufficiently blameless.
12819 Coit Road
Cleveland, Ohio
Originator: Two charts are just great. Very helpful. Two is a lot more
than one.
VP: Yeah, it’s like twice as much.
910 Lousiana Street
Houston, Texas
VP: There is only so much you can do with one hand.
Co-worker: I’m not going to touch that.
910 Lousiana Street
Houston, Texas
Exec: Okay, before I forget…um. I already forgot.
460 Park Ave South
New York, NY
Overheard by: J.B.
CEO: We can’t shoot our parents until we can afford to move out of the house.
355 Burrard Street
Vancouver, British Columbia
Canadia
Musician: Nice of you to join us.
Exec: Well, you were 30 minutes late; I went to take a shit!
Musician: You’re entitled to that.
Exec: I washed my hand if you want to shake it.
875 6th Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: N & S
CIO on speaker: Time out guys, an animal just came into my
office…Cats aren’t allowed in my office till after 5.
2 Industrial Park Drive
Williamston, Michigan
Owner: You’ve got to tell me these things. I don’t know everything that’s going on…you’d be surprised at what I don’t know.
2100 Goshen Road
Fort Wayne, Indiana
Subordinate #1, middle-aged: So, how’s your broken toe doing, [Sara]?
VP [Sara]: It still hurts, but after four tries, I finally found a pair of high heels I can stand in.
Subordinate #1: Should you be doing that yet?
VP: I have a date tonight and need to look cute.
Subordinate 2, older: You shouldn’t be wearing heels yet. You’re going to ruin your feet so that when you’re old like me you’ll be able to wear only ugly shoes.
VP: I’ll be married by then, so it won’t matter!
208 South LaSalle
Chicago, Illinois
