Real estate agent #1: My son is teaching himself how to play guitar! He’s getting real good!
Real estate agent #2: That’s great! What’s he using?
Real estate agent #1: This program called Guitar Hero.
Morris Plains, New Jersey
Overheard by: JMB
Archive for the ‘Education’ Category
…And When Is It Being Delivered?
Coworker #1: Our annual report is going to be delivered today. Please let me know when it arrives.
Coworker #2: How often do we get that?
University of Michigan, Ann Arbor
People Say Time Goes by Fast, but It Doesn’t
Teacher: My birthday is tomorrow. I can’t believe I’m going to be 35!
Student teacher: I’m only 23.
Teacher: When I was 23, I was going to chapel at university while smoking pot!
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Overheard by: Really??
Which Is Why I’m “Employee Of the Month”
CSR to coworker: I don’t really understand sororities. I’ve always been able to make friends, get drunk and have random sex without having to pay dues.
Nashville, Tennessee
To Be Fair, You Are Drinking a Mint Julep Right Now
Boss: So what school did you go to again?
Worker: The University of Illinois.
Boss: Right…that’s an Ivy League school, right?
Worker: (stunned silence)
Boston, Massachusetts
The Clerk Used to Work at Starbucks
Customer: I need to get a dozen and a half, mixed.
Clerk, counting on her day-glo orange fingernails: It’d be cheaper if you got 18.
Customer: What’s the difference?
Clerk: ten cents.
Smirking customer: Ok, I’ll take 18.
Dunkin’ Donuts
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: are u kidding me?
Let Me Just Unzip My Briefcase
Male visitor: I am here because of a class that I missed due to my court case. She (points to professor) told me I could get credit if I showed her my subpoenas.
Campbell University
North Carolina
No Need to Get All Pissy
Law clerk #1: Yeah, we got our class ranks last week.
Law clerk #2: Ugh! My school is taking forever. I should write them a letter. I’m so mad. I just want them to know how incontinent they are.
Chicago, Illinois
I See Your Attempt at Humor, and I Refuse to Acknowledge It
Deskie #1: What’s that smell? Sulfur? Rotten eggs?
Deskie #2: I have it figured out: It’s Halloween, and all these girls are walking around with nothing covering areas which haven’t been exposed in public since last Halloween.
Deskie #1: I don’t get why that is relevant.
Front desk, Central Michigan University
Mount Pleasant, Michigan
Overheard by: Not A Deskie
I Myself Am a Pepperoni-American
Professor: America is a melting pot.
Dude: America is not a melting pot… It’s more of a Lunchable. We are all in the same place, but we keep to our own little compartments.
1906 College Heights Boulevard
Bowling Green, Kentucky
Overheard by: hyacinth_hunter
