Fattie: I swear to Christ, I’m gonna shove that Blackberry up your ass if you bring it to another sales meeting.
1100 Nicollet Mall
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Steven Grafing
Archive for July, 2021
And Don’t Start With Me About Beam Lube
Female architect to male engineer: I don’t care about the size of your beam, it’s not going to fit in this space I have!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Office temp
Zippo Pour L’Homme
Editor: I smell lighter fluid. Is that new cologne someone’s wearing?
News building, 57th Street and 10th Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Nik
Nothing Tastes as Good as Friends…hip
Intern #1: Can I try your sandwich?
Intern #2: Let me think about it for…no. Friendship, food: two very different things.
136 Tooley Street
London, England
Overheard by: Jessica Reed
But That’s Why We Have Interns
Red-faced manager: Frozen again! God fucking dammit! Jesus fucking Christ! I’m getting really fucking pissed off at this motherfucking computer!
Nonchalant passerby: Kick it, then.
Plymouth, Michigan
Though I Knew How to Walk in the Shoes Properly
COO: So my son, his sisters have started dressing him up in their clothes and their mother’s high heels. I’ll come home and he’s clomping around in those shoes, and jewelry and a dress!
Openly gay office manager: That used to happen to me too!
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Your Soda’s Probably Gay, Honey
Oblivious female coworker trying to drink soda through a straw: I think it’s broken. I keep sucking and sucking, but nothing comes out.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
The Technology’s Not Quite There Yet, Bob
Coworker #1: About that e‑mail you sent… Do you want me to copy the file onto a disc and mail it or do you want me to send the file as an e‑mail attachment?
Coworker #2: So you can’t just copy the file to a disc and e‑mail the disc?
Brentwood, Tennessee
9AM Back to Work
Older dude: You know, you shouldn’t bite your nails.
Executive assistant: You shouldn’t be a drunk.
45 West Portal Avenue
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Jerkey
1PM Lunch
Staff #1: Does anyone know what that sign refers to?
Senior Associate: Which one?
Staff #1: The one that says “2121 Lunch E On”.
Staff #2: Did you just say “Lunch E On”?
Staff #1: Well, what does it say?
2345 Crystal Drive
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: Ten Kay
