Archive for 2019

You’ll Change Your Tune When You See It Screw.

CTO: Hey, what are you do­ing?
Fe­male work­ing on of­fice chair with pow­er screw­driv­er: Try­ing to prove I don’t need a man. So far, I’m suc­ceed­ing.
CTO: To­tal­ly wrong pow­er tool for that.

Los An­ge­les, Cal­i­for­nia

12PM In­ven­to­ry

Co-work­er #1: What are some com­mon plas­tics?
Co-work­er #2: Um, that list is re­al­ly long. Just look for “poly­mers.”
Co-work­er #1: Well, what are some com­mon poly­mers?
Co-work­er #2: No, re­al­ly, that list is longer than my arm. Just look for stuff that starts with “poly.”
Co-work­er #1: …Is ce­ram­ic a poly­mer?
Co-work­er #2: Um. No.

500 Du­lany Street
Alexan­dria, Vir­ginia

Over­heard by: Colleen

Would­n’t Fit?

Man­ag­er: and then he got mad at me be­cause my tongue’s too big!

Tam­pa, Flori­da

Over­heard by: h

4PM Call [the Client]

Sec­re­tary: [The client] keeps call­ing and ask­ing for me. And you know what? The next time he does that, I’m go­ing to tell him that you lied to him.
Boss: What? Why?
Sec­re­taty: Be­cause you tell him you’re go­ing to do all these things for him, and you don’t!
Boss: That’s be­cause he’s an id­iot!

527 West Jef­fer­son Street
Louisville, Ken­tucky