Archive for 2019

3PM Smoke Break

Co-work­er #1: She came over to our area, start­ed both­er­ing us, and then com­plained about the noise. She just gets me re­al­ly riled up some­times.
Co-work­er #2: The oth­er girls seem to like her.
Co-work­er #1: Yeah, that’s why you have to be nice to her. Oth­er­wise I’d set her on fire.

383 Madi­son Av­enue
New York, NY

Over­heard by: kt

Oh, and Pho­to­copy the Porn

Male cowork­er #1: So, what do you even do back there, Allen*?
Male cowork­er #2: Apart from sift­ing through all of that mail.
Male cowork­er #1: And mak­ing pho­to­copies.
Allen: Watch porn and whack off.
Male cowork­er #1, laugh­ing: Se­ri­ous­ly?
Allen: Hell yeah.
Male cowork­er #1: Dude. You’re my idol.

Of­fice on 48th Av­enue
New York, New York

Forc­ing Us to Hire More Temps

Mid­dle-aged man­ag­er: Whoa! You’re new here!
Young fe­male temp (mak­ing copies): Yeah, I just start­ed on Mon­day, I’m a temp.
Mid­dle-aged man­ag­er: Has any­one shown you the dead bod­ies yet?
Young fe­male temp: Uh, no.
Mid­dle-aged man­ag­er: Once the temps re­al­ize what creeps we are, they kill us.

Min­neapo­lis, Min­neso­ta

Over­heard by: a temp

Or Are You Just Gen­er­al­ly Greasy and Salty?

Of­fice chick: You know what the best part of get­ting Mc­Don­ald’s is? Just when you think you’re done, you find five or six bonus fries in the bot­tom of the bag.
Of­fice dude: It’s the sim­ple plea­sures for you, huh?
Of­fice chick: Oh yeah, noth­ing bet­ter! Some­thing small and salty to snack on!
Of­fice dude, filled with in­nu­en­do: In that case, I have an­oth­er bonus fry for you to en­joy.
Of­fice chick: Se­ri­ous­ly? I think you just ad­mit­ted to hav­ing a small dick.

Figueroa St
Los An­ge­les, Cal­i­for­nia