Supervisor: So Tina* and I are actually getting along really well! We discovered that we both have the same work style, which is Crazy Psycho Bitch.
473 Ridge Road
Dayton, New Jersey
Overheard by: office peon
Supervisor: So Tina* and I are actually getting along really well! We discovered that we both have the same work style, which is Crazy Psycho Bitch.
473 Ridge Road
Dayton, New Jersey
Overheard by: office peon
Sales guy #1: Wanna go across the street to the deli for lunch? I hear they make a mean BLT.
Sales guy #2: They’re expensive.
Sales guy #1: Dude… I’m so frekkin rich I wipe my ass with dollar bills.
Seattle, Washington
CEO wrapping up a video conference: I just want to thank everyone for making this the best three-way I’ve ever had!
Traverse City, Michigan
Overheard by: Admin Assistant K
Cubicle mate: When he sings “My Corona,” is he talking about his beer? (later, once lyrics are explained) What the hell is a “Sharona,” anyway?
Scarborough
Canadia
Guy in cubicle on phone: Well, it feels like it’s about 3 or 4 inches up in there! No… No. Well, did you see the pictures? Because you can totally see it’s all the way up in there!
Oil Company
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Guy clerk: Hey, this safety pamphlet says to get into the bathtub if a tornado is coming.
Gal clerk: Well, duh, why don’t they just build houses shaped like giant bathtubs?
5760 East Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
<b>president:</b> let me put it this way… I make a lot of money, you should trust me.
Fort Mill, SC
Engineer: The woodridge office is nice. They have an intercom system.
Secretary: We have that too. It’s called screaming over the top of the cubicles.
Wheaton, Illinois
Worker getting up from corner of a desk: Oh my god, I think I sat on a nerve… My penis is numb! You know the technique “the stranger” where you sit on your hand?
Coworker: Yeah.
Numb worker: This is the opposite of that, it’s like I have someone else’s penis in my pants right now.
168th Street
Omaha, Nebraska
Lab worker packing specimens to send to reference lab: Wow! I don’t have any gonorrhea or chlamydia today!
Kokomo, Indiana
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist