Archive for 2018

Um, the Bras Are for My Wife

Cashier to customer: These are cute bras. I wish I had big boobs. Everyone says I should be happy with what I got, but I think I’d like big ones. [Customer stares silently.] Guys like big ones. Not saying yours are big or anything, but I wish I had your boobs.

2000 Barnett Shoals Road
Athens, Georgia

Though I Could Also Picture David Duchovny Saying It

New partner, opening mail: Oh, it's my gold card. Wonder what's the difference between this and a regular Amex.
Smart-ass IT guy: Well, it creates a gravitational anomaly when you whip it out in high-end restaurants, causing all the girls' panties to hit the floor.
New partner: I could have asked a thousand people that question, only you would have given that answer.

Winnipeg
Canadia