Archive for 2018

They’re Pret­ty Dim, Sum Co-Work­ers.

Cowork­er #1: I wish my Chi­nese food would just get here al­ready!
Cowork­er #2: Se­ri­ous­ly, it’s been like three min­utes since you called. If you are ex­pect­ing some­thing that fast you are go­ing to be dis­ap­point­ed be­cause nin­jas are *Japan­ese*!

Queens, New York


3PM Cof­fee Break

Pay­roll: Have you been out­side to­day? It’s get­ting re­al­ly warm!
Em­ploy­ee: Yes, I mag­i­cal­ly tele­port­ed here this morn­ing with­out ever step­ping out­side.

22342 Aveni­da Em­pre­sa
Ran­cho San­ta Mar­gari­ta, Cal­i­for­nia

Oh, Go Ahead — I Need to Lose Some Weight, Any­way

Black woman: Ce­cil* has this gi­ant boil on his back and he got this idea about us­ing the vac­u­um clean­er…
White woman: Stop! I’m eat­ing lunch here. No sto­ries about boils.
Black woman: Would a sto­ry about Ce­cil’s idea about con­sti­pa­tion and a vac­u­um clean­er be al­right?

5760 East High­way 80
Pearl, Mis­sis­sip­pi

Over­heard by: Brain Danc­ing