Archive for 2018

I’m Just Ex­cit­ed Be­cause My Ship­ment Ar­rived from Colom­bia

Kind su­per­vi­sor: I just want­ed to ask you to low­er your voice a lit­tle bit. You must have got­ten some good news on the phone, but you were a lit­tle ram­bunc­tious with the lan­guage. I think you said (whis­per­ing) “shit” three times dur­ing that call.
Em­bar­rassed sec­re­tary: You ask so lit­tle of me, and I still can’t do it. I mean, who has to tell a grown woman not to yell “shit” in a crowd­ed of­fice?

Gov­ern­ment Of­fice
Tam­pa, Flori­da

Note to Self: Stop Be­ing Creepy

La­dy pe­on: Beau­ti­ful day, is­n’t it?
Male pe­on: Sure is — some fine weath­er here.
La­dy pe­on: I hope it lasts, but I don’t know about this week­end — I’ve heard it might get cool.
Male pe­on: Yeah, that must be hard for women.
La­dy pe­on: What?
Male pe­on: Yeah, it must hard try­ing to fig­ure out what to wear — shorts, sko­rts, capris, pants, skirts. Guys don’t have that prob­lem.
La­dy pe­on: Okay. You have a good day.

Gene­seo, New York