Coworker on phone: What? So even for a million pounds you wouldn’t let her sit on your face?!
Soho
London
England
Coworker on phone: What? So even for a million pounds you wouldn’t let her sit on your face?!
Soho
London
England
Coworker #1: Another thing I recommend for you website is breadcrumb navigation, which…
Coworker #2: You know, now they have GPS.
Santa Barbara, California
Loan officer: Things are uncertain in America. They want to cash out on their equity because things are turmoilous.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Lady peon: Beautiful day, isn’t it?
Male peon: Sure is — some fine weather here.
Lady peon: I hope it lasts, but I don’t know about this weekend — I’ve heard it might get cool.
Male peon: Yeah, that must be hard for women.
Lady peon: What?
Male peon: Yeah, it must hard trying to figure out what to wear — shorts, skorts, capris, pants, skirts. Guys don’t have that problem.
Lady peon: Okay. You have a good day.
Geneseo, New York
Proofreader, warily: Your “Cat Peed on my Banjo” song sounds suspiciously like “Dueling Banjos”!
Washington, DC
Engineer cleaning out her purse: Hey look! I had four cereal bars in there!
Geeky coworker: Look at the way those are laying next to each other on the desk, one right next to the other… Those aren’t cereal, they are parallel universes!
Richmond Road
Cleveland, Ohio
Overheard by: The Surly Programmer
IT manager: So do you want to come and find me this afternoon? We can talk about that thing.
Receptionist: Sure, I’m having it a manicure at 2.30, we can do it after that.
IT manager: Okay, but won’t you have to wait for your nails to dry?
Receptionist: Oh, am I going to have to touch something?
IT manager: No, don’t worry, you won’t have to touch anything.
London
England
Receptionist, after seeing picture of a child born with no hands: That’s terrible! So do they grow back?
University of Miami
Coral Gables, Florida
Overheard by: Guy Who Originally Found the Picture
Co-worker: He’s either “dead” or “passed away.”
9111 East Douglas Avenue
Wichita, Kansas
Overheard by: Nate
Dude: I bought a tea today in the first time in months.
Chick: I’m proud of you…?
Dude: Well, I threw it away when I got back here.
Chick: What? Why?
Dude: There wasn’t any sugar in it.
Chick: Did you ask for sweet tea? Wait, we’re in the South — it should just be assumed you want sweet tea.
Dude: Yeah, I know, right? But it wasn’t.
Chick: You should have asked them if they just weren’t catering to their southern customers and made a scene. That would have been fun.
Dude: Well, I did yell at them. I was, like, four miles away at the time, but I was really cussing them out.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist