Archive for January, 2018

Or Making Them Spicy

Yuppie mom on cell: I mean, I swear — America is turning into, like, old-school Russia. You know, with like, the Gazpacho running around killing people.

Whole Foods
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Deadly and Delicious

And I Woke Up With a Mouthful Of Fur!

Receptionist on phone: He had to be ranked in the top three best boy kitties! (pause) It was intense and we didn’t get home until 11pm!

Springfield, Massachusetts


They’re Pretty Dim, Sum Co-Workers.

Coworker #1: I wish my Chinese food would just get here already!
Coworker #2: Seriously, it’s been like three minutes since you called. If you are expecting something that fast you are going to be disappointed because ninjas are *Japanese*!

Queens, New York