Archive for 2017

Pope Bene­dict: True Dat

Catholic sem­i­nary li­brary em­ploy­ee: Are you go­ing to in­ter­view Jane’s friend for the po­si­tion?
Catholic sem­i­nary li­brary su­per­vi­sor: No, I de­cid­ed she was­n’t qual­i­fied enough.
Catholic sem­i­nary li­brary em­ploy­ee: That’s a re­lief.
Catholic sem­i­nary li­brary su­per­vi­sor, sur­prised: Why do you say that? Don’t you like her?
Catholic sem­i­nary li­brary em­ploy­ee: It’s just that… Have you ever over­heard any of their phone con­ver­sa­tions?
Catholic sem­i­nary li­brary su­per­vi­sor: No.
Catholic sem­i­nary li­brary em­ploy­ee: It’s like they’re in a com­pe­ti­tion over who has the most in­tense vi­sions of the blessed Vir­gin Mary. We al­ready get enough of that shit.

Cal­i­for­nia

Over­heard by: bless me for I have sinned

Pa­tient: Hey! It’s Damn Cold in This Pa­per Gown

Physi­cian: What can you tell me about this X‑ray?
Stu­dent: It’s a male pelvis with two frac­tures.
Physi­cian: It’s shaped like a male pelvis, but it’s not.
Stu­dent: How can you tell?
Physi­cian: The lack of a pe­nis out­line on the X‑ray helps.

Emer­gency Room, Uni­ver­si­ty of Kansas Hos­pi­tal
Kansas City, Kansas

Over­heard by: Sti­fling the Laugh