Archive for 2017

Why “Can I Help You With Any­thing?” Can Be a Dan­ger­ous Ques­tion.

Large ef­fem­i­nate guy with Ger­man ac­cent: These are the metal­lic pen­cils you do not have! (waves cray­ola box at em­ploy­ee)
Em­ploy­ee: Okay… Sir?
Ger­man guy: Do you know vat I am mak­ing? A por­trait of Al Pa­ci­no! To re­al­ly cap­ture his man­li­ness! Once I did a pic­ture in char­coal but my art teacher said to re­al­ly get the ef­fect, I vould haf to burn it!

Joan­n’s Fab­rics
Los An­ge­les, Cal­i­for­nia

Over­heard by: many­bells­down

Okay, So Part of That Was in My Head

Pro­fes­sor: A few years ago I had a stu­dent ask me for an al­ter­na­tive fi­nal be­cause he had sched­uled a va­ca­tion in Barcelona for the week of the fi­nal. I told him, ‘Die, yup­pie scum! And no.’

En­gi­neer­ing build­ing, UC San­ta Cruz

Over­heard by: Jes­si­ca P.