Archive for April, 2017

… Im­po­tence, In­con­ti­nence, Flat­u­lence, Pri­apism…

Train­ing in­struc­tor: You should not up­grade the soft­ware right when a patch comes out. Some­times it may have bugs.
Stu­dent: So, it’s like when you take a drug, some­times it can have side ef­fects like—
Train­ing in­struc­tor: Yeah, but let’s keep the dis­cus­sion fo­cused on soft­ware.
Stu­dent: —Throw­ing up, vom­it­ing…
Train­ing in­struc­tor: Uh, yeah.

Madi­son, Al­aba­ma

1PM Nap­time

Sales as­sis­tant: What are you do­ing?
QC guy: Tak­ing a nap.
Sales as­sis­tant: You are pre­car­i­ous­ly close to your CPU.
QC guy: What? What is that, a part of my body?
Sales as­sis­tant: Right. Don’t call me when you break that com­put­er again.

8220 Eng­land Street
Char­lotte, North Car­oli­na

Tell You What — Half Price for You. You Can Give the Six Dol­lars to Me

Girl #1: Um­mm, we need to make copies, and we don’t want to spend a lot of mon­ey.
Stu­dent work­er: The copi­er over there is 10 cents, same as every­where on cam­pus.
Girl #1: That’s so ex­pen­sive!
Stu­dent work­er: You could al­so scan the pa­pers and print them out. That’s free.
Girl #1: What do you mean?
Stu­dent work­er: Um­mm, you can put them on the scan­ner, hit ‘Scan,’ and then when they pop up, hit ‘Print.‘
Girl #1: I don’t know about this whole scan­ning thing — it sounds re­al­ly com­pli­cat­ed.
Girl #2: But that sounds bet­ter than mak­ing copies. I mean, we on­ly need 12, and I don’t want to spend 12 dol­lars.

Cam­pus li­brary, Be­mid­ji State Uni­ver­si­ty
Be­mid­ji, Min­neso­ta