Archive for August, 2016

Hero­in Chic Fi­nal­ly Ar­rives in Utah

“well, I ac­tu­al­ly like to stick things in­to my body.” said by team man­ag­er when some­one ex­pressed dis­dain about get­ting a flu shot.

2835 Deck­er Lake Dri­ve, Salt Lake City

Thanks, Adder­all!

Cowork­er to boss: What were we talk­ing about? Oh yeah, mul­ti­task­ing!

Hous­ton, Texas

But Count Me In!

IT guy #1: It se­ri­ous­ly sound­ed like some­one was drown­ing a midget [makes high-pitched gar­gling nois­es].
IT guy #2, just walk­ing in from hall: Whoa, that’s not a con­ver­sa­tion I’m nor­mal­ly apart of.

Rich­mond, Vir­ginia

But You Can Say “Sa­tan Plant­ed the Di­nosaur Bones”?

Front of­fice la­dy #1: “Abra­ham be­got Isaac.” What does that mean?
Front of­fice la­dy #2: It means Abra­ham is Isaac’s fa­ther ‑he had Isaac. It’s like “Adam knew Eve.” That means Adam banged her.
Front of­fice la­dy #1: I don’t think you can say that.

Med­ical Of­fice
Lin­coln, Ne­bras­ka