Grunt #1: Jack* and Cindy* both wore maroon shirts and pinstripe pants to work today.
Grunt #2: Don’t you wish they’d just make out already?
Grunt #1: Totally.
Wausau, Wisconsin
Archive for April, 2016
As It Should Be
IT guy to woman holding two cups: Ah: Two Cups, One Girl!
Blacktown
Australia
Overheard by: Tim
I Don’t Know — Is It?
Manager: First thing we do is get back control of petty cash.
HR clerk: Isn’t that like closing the barn door after the coke has been snorted?
5760 Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
How Often Is That Necessary?
Boss: Me and my wife would drive a hundred miles for a jar of good pickles!
10749 West 84th Terrace
Lenexa, Kansas
Overheard by: PeaveyMan
Emerge from Bankruptcy? Absolutely.
CEO: People don’t do that with their pants down, do they? They just unzip, right?
Manhattan, New York
How Does That Symbolize Employee Empowerment?
Temp: So the seal was playing a wind instrument?
Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts
And Thailand Laughed So Hard a Roll Came Out
Coworker #1: So, what is a Thai roll?
Coworker #2: Well, Thailand is a country…
Coworker #3, laughing: Oops, I just farted…I laughed so hard a fart came out.
Bethpage, New York
Overheard by: Gette
Fat Gene Linked to Responsibility– More Details to Follow
Female CSR #1: Did you get a brownie?
Slightly-larger female CSR: No, I can’t leave my desk and work to get a brownie. That would be brushing off my duties.
Female CSR #1: Well, I’m not a fat person. I wouldn’t know.
473 Ridge Road
Dayton, New Jersey
Overheard by: office peon
9AM Back to Work
Co-worker: She was like, “Nigga, just drop me off at daycare and go about your business.”
11100 USA Parkway
Fishers, Indiana
Overheard by: minkey
Sounds Like a Motivational Poster
Woman #1: I feel bad he’s stuck talking to her. I feel like I should rescue him.
Woman #2: Oh, they deserve each other; they’re both full of shit.
Woman #1: But his is a different kind of shit.
Woman #2: Yeah; his is bull, hers is horse.
175 S. Third Street
Columbus, Ohio
